A little guidebook for someone like me

Hey, it's been a while. I know my last post was a little bit depressing. I think i am what they call a pessimist person who bad things happen to. But, you know what they say..or in this case, what John Lennon said, 

"I get by with a little help from my friends.."

Well, besides my friends, i bought this book just a couple weeks ago and it's been a help for me. It's called 'Saya, Ayah, dan Tragedi 1965' written by Nani Nurrachman Sutojo. She's the daughter of one of the generals who was killed in our dark historical blood-shed tragedy in 1965, known for the involvement of The National Communist Party.

The first part of the book is interesting for me, because she shared her personal life and how she got through with everything that happened to her. The second part is mostly her speech texts in which she talked about all these series of events in our dark history and her personal feelings about them as a 'victim'. But aren't we all a victim?

Anyway, can you imagine being fifteen and orphaned? Her mother died when she was very young, and when she's fifteen, her father was taken away from her and murdered? Everything about the tragedy is a mystery and she can never get the truth out of it, she couldn't do anything but forgive but never forget. And then she lost her brother in her twenties. She mentioned how her life is a series of unfortunate deaths a couple of times, but the whole book is about going through it. It's like no matter how depressed she is, there's always a way, and it's all inside of you. 

There's a story where she met a victim of holocaust, the victim was an old lady, a jew. She lost her husband and son to the holocaust, but she survived. Plus, she was an atheist, she didn't believe in God, but she believed that is how life is so she must go on. She had a new husband afterward, but he too died too soon and left her all alone. Can you imagine being tortured and survived through but lost everything she has ever loved? How can she go on living? 

All of this has made me realize that what i have to deal with is really a no big deal if being compared to what these two amazing ladies have gone through. I have thought of this thing several times but i keep forgetting, that the world is so big, so never ever complain like your problem is the ONLY problem in the world. Someone out there must be going through something much more devastating than you. 

I made a promise to myself after reading this book that i would never forget that again. I'm not the only orphan in the world, i am considered lucky even. Read it, you might like it. I sure did, helped me a lot. 

Night, 

Rifa