If you now ask me how have i been holding up. I'd say that i am adapting. Because that is exactly what i'm doing ever since my mother's first chemotherapy. It was a few days before "lebaran" and it was a bad time for me and my mother's brothers and sisters because my maid has left for her hometown and we all shared chores in my house. You see, after my mother came home, we still kept the shift going, every night and every day, each of my aunts or uncles would take turns coming to my house to keep an eye on my mother. And every day i'd sweep the whole house and sometimes mop.          

My brother on the other hand is still stubborn. He's still just a boy even though he's already on tenth grade. He won't yet understand how much our mother needs us. He's still trapped in his own world, assuming that playing the computer almost everyday is okay. He probably thought there are me and my aunts or uncles that will keep my mom company and help out, i don't really blame him, i just simply calls him a boy. Because a boy would feel he doesn't need to take any part taking care of his mother when others are involved. I just want to scream to him that things won't go back to normal from now on, you should take part in this problem!

But let's just let him be for a while, he'll come around.

So a few days after her first chemo, she's still very normal. She sometimes suffocate and use the oxygen tank, but now the problem is only her stomach. The liquid is still producing and we're hoping for a better result after a few chemos. If it's only throwing up i would assume it's the side effect of chemo, but the liquid, the abnormal size of my mother's stomach, doesn't really show much progress.

They say it would take 6 chemos or more, and this would all end in December , the least. I strongly hope it will. If the chemos end in December, added up with at least two months recovery, my mother would be able to go back to her teaching in January or March. 

There's nothing i could ask for except your prayers. Thank you for stopping by my blog and for reading this awfully depressing post.

Good night, 


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